lamp-lit and dying,
old men enjoying
the moonlight,
not expecting tomorrow.
Laughing, they hang there,
fondling their age-old loved ones
under the branches,
fawning,
hushing their rustling into the silent, cold morning.
Leaves,
brighter they shine there than lanterns burning
under the branches. Entangled.
Leaves, bright-eyed and yearning,
yearning to shake themselves free of the tree,
to fall at last, to frolic and be
free to explore this moonlit wonder,
free to flee to be trodden under.
will look for excitement in
Dust's History and such
This is simply beautiful, Dave! I love the poignancy, especially of the first stanza.
ReplyDeleteIf you'd like a smile you might wish to visit this page another friend highlighted for error messages in haiku form!
http://baetzler.de/humor/haiku_error.var
Derrick
ReplyDeleteThanks for the comment and for the link. I shall be there anon.
Oh, and thanks for reminding me that I had forgotten today's Haiku!!
Dave! Welcome to Magpie! No, you're not late at all. I usually post the new photo prompt late Wednesday or Thursday, then you have until the following Tuesday to post your entry.
ReplyDeleteBeautiful piece. The second stanza, especially, is exquisite.
Just had to look up the conference, Dave and, having googled the history of dust, I can see there's plenty of scope!
ReplyDeleteDave,
ReplyDeleteThis is one of the best ....
The leaves like old men enjoying the moonlight - very nice!
ReplyDeleteStrummed Words
Old men enjoying the moonlight maybe because they enjoyed the excitement of moonlight when they were young - maybe the leaves remembered the time they were young too (don't we all, Dave)
ReplyDeleteIt's to accompany yours, maybe you have already read it in my blog.
ReplyDeleteAnyway I'll put it in my blog again to celebrate Autumn.
LEAVES
Rust-red, ginger in the winter wood, in the rain.
In a day that could be the bleakest,
low clouds, grey air, mud on stark stone.
But it is not so, with this glisten the rain gives to the bones
laying out its tongue of lustre, its blush, its sparkle.
We have entered the roar and stare of a stage
where we are led on both quiet and startled.
And we sense it’s easy
to sink and soar,
be buried in branches and drops
with all along the crimson squelch of the ditch,
while letting
our pulse beat, transpire and leave,
the bubbles of our adhering selves be,
our gaze at one with the red carpet of earth,
breathing on the rise, the lines
of sweat running with the blood, so close
to the leaves, the film of our steps,
the skin of the here-and-now.
And. I really enjoyed your poem, great "Entangled", great rhymes, in particular the supple couplet at the end.
ReplyDeletewonderful poem as usual Dave. Thanks for sharing it.
ReplyDeleteNice visual of leaves laughing.
ReplyDeleteA look back - it never changes even though the seasons race forward. Lovely piece!
ReplyDeletethis is a gorgeous, rich with images, poem. Wonderful!
ReplyDeleteDave, I join in with accolades for your writing (you took the prompt in a unique direction) and also just love the first verse!
ReplyDeleteThe sere, the yellowleaf! Lovely, Dave.
ReplyDeleteTruly a beautiful, beautiful expression of autumn!
ReplyDeleteYour language and imagery are lovely in this, Dave.
ReplyDeleteWhat a wonderful poem expressing the yearnings of a leaf. Very nicely done.
ReplyDeletelamp-lit and dying ... smtimes these autumn leaves do look as if lit from within...especially the golden ones.
ReplyDeletethose last two lines are like two sides of the coin...they can be free and trodden under...it made me pause and reflect. nice magpie!
ReplyDeletewillow
ReplyDeleteMy thanks for your welcome, comment and info'. That sounds like a very civilized arrangement. I shall remember it.
Derrick
The more I think about it, the more I think I'd quite like to be there!
Helen
Appreciate that. Thanks.
Strummed Words
A warm welcome to my blog and my thanks for taking the time to leave a comment..
The Weaver of Grass
Indeed we do, and in fact there was much rememberance of times past in this poem.
Tommaso
with this glisten the rain gives to the bones
laying out its tongue of lustre, its blush, its sparkle.
We have entered the roar and stare of a stage
where we are led on both quiet and startled.
There's much to admire and enjoy, but for me these lines were supreme.
And thanks for the comment, particularly on the final couplet. I wasn't sure how that would be received.
Carl
Good to hear. Thanks.
TechnoBabe
The prompt was so compellingly visual.
Tumblewords
You are so right about it never changing. And about them racing forward!
kathew
Welome most warmly to the blog and my thanks for a very generous comment.
Mary
Thank you very much for that. Really appreciated.
Dick
Thanks Dick. Nice comment to have.
Diane T
A warm welcome to you and grateful thanks for stopping by to comment.
Karen
Appreciate the comment very much.
Teresa
A welcome comment and a warm welcome to you. Thanks indeed.
kathi harris
A warm welcome
Yes, I agree. They do, very much so. Thank you for your comment and for taking the time to do so.
Brian
A warm welcome and my thanks for visiting. The comment, also, is very much appreciated.
Your leaves kicked up a storm in the moonlight...
ReplyDeletewonderful..beautiful imagery and flow
ReplyDeleteThat was so moving, Dave. The imagery and the emotional resonance were there for me and I was really captured by the first two stanzas. Excellent.
ReplyDeleteLovely, Dave.You haven't lost our touch and never will.
ReplyDeleteThanks for visiting.
Nice imagery... leaves, bright-eyed and yearning... like this line.
ReplyDeleteNicely done
Jinksy
ReplyDeleteYup, it's what we olduns do best.
Rene
A warm welcome to you and my thanks for your generous comment.
Rachel
Thank you so much, that was really appreciated.
Friko
Thanks for the vote of confidence. I shall remember that at times of doubt!
Reflections
Welcome to my blog and sincere thanks for the comment.
Wonderful write here. Nice Mag...Love and Light, Sender
ReplyDeletevery well written...
ReplyDeletethoughtful tale.
senderupwords
ReplyDeleteA warm welcome to you and many thanks for your comment.
Jingle
Much thanks for thank and welcome indeed to the blog.
Dave this is lovely! :-)
ReplyDeleteCarrie
ReplyDeleteA warm welcome to you and many thanks for stopping by to comment.
Invite you to try the prompts at Writer's Island...
ReplyDeletewritersisland
ReplyDeleteWelcome to mine, will certainly give your a try. Thanks.