Popular Posts

Thursday 19 May 2011

Short Story

Rough seas all night
rock falls from cliffs
the cave is rearranged
rocks     pebbles     shingle     sand.
A squeeze-through opening is new.

Our torches prick the gloom
Jake it is who finds it.
Wished it had been me,
but his beam picks it out,
reflects back two bright eyes.

We try both beams, but still the gloom
ignores them and their fading batteries.
Octopus          or giant spider
decomposing slightly
five legs          a wing
sabre toothed          a put-together beast
a composite of several          looks Egyptian     
vaguely          
a holiday memento sort of thing.

Something odd about it, though.
Neither can say what
but we both feel it.
want to run          but hold our ground.

Unthinkingly,
Jake goes to stroke the image          then so do I.

The eyes          stare steadily          and yellowly          ahead.

the rock on which it sits is split          was split          (but when?)
down to its base
the cleft          its facing walls
four finger widths apart
flow with foetal shapes          some fully formed
all coming from its flesh.

We're rich! says Jake      and famous.

Lascaux     Chauvet     Laas Gaa'l     The Cave of Swimmers

Nothing to top this          Stone Age Sci-Fi, this!

Wait 'till we tell...

Let's sit on it a bit (this from me)
Tomorrow we'll return
with all the gear          and cameras.


Another night of pounding seas
and we are back     our fading batteries replaced
that are not needed     daylight floods the cave
a shaft above     another fall of rock     and our way blocked.

Dismay     our chance of fame destroyed.

It's Jake again who spots it first
          
a jagged stone with a glass eye
and just a hint or two of paint
to indicate malevolent intent.

We take it home     they all discredit it
a natural crystal in the rock          an oxide stain
No one believes our tale.

That afternoon police arrived to seal the cave.
POLICE          KEEP OUT          their notice reads.

13 comments:

Windsmoke. said...

Scary to be trapped in a cave by a cave in. Sad finding fossils in the same cave and no one believes you and to add to the insult its sealed off :-).

Zulueta said...

I believe in you....

Tabor said...

REality and the rules of civilization take away the fun of fantasy.

anthonynorth said...

A gripping tale. Excellent.

Dick said...

Intriguing, Dave. Tension built and maintained throughout, the gapping between sentences and phrases providing a sense of the hesitancy of memory across time. Form and content work together to excellent effect here. A great read.

Dick said...

Intriguing, Dave. Tension built and maintained throughout, the gapping between sentences and phrases providing a sense of the hesitancy of memory across time. Form and content work together to excellent effect here. A great read.

Steve Isaak said...

Effective, intriguing, excellent.

The Weaver of Grass said...

Oh Dave - what a scary story - and all the more realistic for being told in verse.

Lolamouse said...

I was holding my breath throughout! A gripping story. I was rooting for you!

Mary said...

Wow, Dave, you had my heart beating faster and faster as I read this poem! Wonderful.

Dave King said...

Windsmoke
And having your great discovery "sealed off"!

Zulueta
Welcome to my blog and my thanks to you for commenting - and believing in me!

Tabor
yes, that's true, they do, I hadn't looked at it that way before. Thanks for the new slant.

anthonynorth
Thanks for those kind words.

Dick
A much appreciated critique. Sincere thanks for it.

Steve
Really good to have you visiting and commenting. Thanks for doing so.


Weaver of Grass
I misread your comment as "what a crazy story"! Not inappropriate, perhaps, but much prefer your actual one. As always generous and helpful. Thanks.

Lolamouse
Wow, what great lungs you must have! Super comment. Thanks very much.

Mary
Lovely comment, much appreciated.

Jim Murdoch said...

Is it a story or a poem? We tend to think of these as separate but obviously not. I’m not sure it’s the best title for this though. Yes, it’s a narrative poem, but I think there’s scope here to do more with the title. Good poem, er story, though. Dick is spot on in his remarks.

Jenny Woolf said...

Beautifully written. Form and words combine to bring the moment to life.