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Friday, 2 December 2011

Whispers from a Sunken World

It is a kind of swimming,
walking through these woods.
Greens still tinge the oatmeal coloured air,
and still there is the feel of floating: moats
caught in currents of high spirits
dancing where the light's rays
bring them into being; seeing
which way's up and which is down
when gravity stays mum
and tells the senses nothing.

Beetles scuttle silently away
like bottom feeders feeding on
the sandy bed. The banks
are dusky and mysterious.
The bed slopes down.
You cannot surface here
where water carves a hollow, stalls,
tracks back upon itself,
by-passes urgency
or is itself by-passed.

It is enough to realise
that here a sense of surface surfaces;
there is a lightening
where two worlds meet,
and that it reassures;
that limbs move freely here;
and that the water parts,
admits me to its inner sanctum,
then closes round me like a cloak,
behind me like a sphincter.

I am enclosed and cosseted.
A babble of white noise
descends from trees.
I think of brooks, white rivers,
summer rain. It sounds like speech,
but muffled by the water.
The bed slopes slowly upwards now,
the waters break, re-birth me
into a world more ill-at-ease
with me and with itself.
My soul takes on
the whispers from my sunken world
to travel back with me.
They will become its prayer.

The prompt at Poet's United's Thursday Think Tank #76 is The Soul's Whisper This is my submission for it.

19 comments:

Elisabeth said...

Back to the womb, Dave. Wonderful.

Eileen T O'Neill ..... said...

Dave,

A superb piece of writing, through which I could see the image, from Poets United and the prompt for this week.
It had a sense of walking along a very secluded forest path. An English forest path and finding at a point, oneself with nature. That unmistakable realisation.

Eileen

haricot said...

All of us are living unknown age and time, as if we are swimming hearig "Whispers from a Sunken World" sometimes.

sunny said...

Hi Mr Dave,i really like to read your poems,job nicely done,braaaaavooo.

Brian Miller said...

a world ill ease with itself and me...yeah i feel that man...the whispers of a sunken world...i hear them...nice piece dave...

Mary said...

Ah yes, prayer is more than surface words. You captured its soulful depth!

Old Raven said...

This is pure empathy. This is also very well crafted.

Mama Zen said...

This thoroughly engaged my senses. Beautiful writing.

Ty-shaun Coles said...

Your imagery is priceless. This poem was so good that I cannot write enough to congratulate you. All I can say is that this was well written, and that you have a new follower, sir. :)

Sheila Moore said...

Yes bring them back as prayers. Sometimes it's all we can do. Great take on the prompt.

Laurie Kolp said...

Dave- this is rich with beautiful images like "Greens still tinge the oatmeal coloured air"... enjoyed it!

Jenny Woolf said...

As usual, very interesting and thought provoking. I like the idea of oatmeal air....makes me imagine floating sawdust actually

Tommaso Gervasutti said...

It sounds like a great prayer...and I agree with Elisabeth, there's a powerful going back to the womb.

Morning said...

your words touch many levels of lives and especially nature.

enjoyed your kind of whispers.
Cheers.

Carrie Burtt said...

"they will become its prayer"....so true Dave....love the use of nature in your comparison.....this is beautiful!!

Windsmoke. said...

The imagery in the last stanza does it for me, well done :-).

Dave King said...

Elisabeth
I knew a guy who reckoned he had memories of the womb. (!??) Thanks for the comment.

Eileen
The perfect realisation. Exactly what I had intended to convey. Thank you so much.

haricot
A great observation. Imaginative and very apt. Sincere thanks for it.

sunny
Thanks a million, sunny. Much appreciated.

Brian
The feeling seems all too strong these days and getting stronger unfortunately. A very encouraging response, though. Thank you.

Mary
So very true. In fact, prayer can be wordless - the imageless lifting of the mind and spirit to God. Appreciated the comment. Thanks.

Old Raven
Many many thanks for such encouragement.

Mama Zen
A comment to savour. Much gratitude for it.

Ty-shaun
Hi! A very warm welcome to you and my very appreciative thanks for your generous comment.

Sheila
I think you are correct. It's certainly the first thing we can do. Thanks.

Laurie
Thank you. It is very gratifying to me that you should pick out that particular line.

Jenny
That is incredible. I did have something like floating sawdust in mind, if not in connection with that exact phrase, but when speaking of the motes, for example. I did have an occasion in mind and there was something like it in the air.

Tommaso
Yes, it's a powerful urge in many, I think. Particularly at certain times. much thanks.

Morning
Hi, good to have your visit and the comment is very satisfying. Thank you.

Carrie
Hi and very welcome, you are to the blog. Thank you for your kind words. They are much appreciated.

Windsmoke
Interesting - and pleasing - you should pick that one. Thanks for saying.

Isabel Doyle said...

lovely

Rob San Miguel said...

I love this