I see it now: exotic jellyfish, it rode the waves and rode them with aplomb; re-shaped itself for trough and crest, its broad black brim spread wide to stabilize it, take it drifting weight through every change of shape. Its lemon crown collected-in the stares of sunbathers and promenaders, both; its double prow of sculpted net and lace had two blue eyes which as it twirled in wind and tide were set to scan the whole wide world. Below it hung the lower net of lace and bits and bobs where feelers should have been. Frinton sea front. My aunt has taken me to convalesce. Another image comes and lays itself above Aunt Julie's hat. Best hat. Reserved for most auspicious times, not everyday! Now on the promenade in contact with my chunky wooden train. Red engine -- lodged against the hat -- green truck, grey carriages and guards van midnight blue. Final image. Composite. The same two. Black-and-white. Cut from a local paper, but now torn and incomplete. No wording -- and no me! No clues to the mysteries. .............................
Victoria C. Slotto for dVerse Poets, Meeting the Bar has been giving us a master class on the Imagists and communication under the title of The Medium is the Message. Please do go and have a read of it.
16 comments:
Complex, fragmented and surreal - as memories so often are. You have achieved yet another triumph. Thank you.
interesting....the jellyfish, the train and the newspaper clipping that does not include you...while you convolesce...the jelly fish was the more promenant to me and carries a lot of symbolism....nicely done sir...
I like the fragmented feel to this poem - it suits the subject matter so well. Memories are like that, aren't they?
And the fact that you are missing from the paper clipping, so it all lives on only in your thoughts...simply amazing!
Yet another masterpiece, Dave!
I love it :)
PS
And my friend with OCD would wholeheartedly approve of the title!! Hehehe:D
What you did with this prompt is absolutely amazing.
The jellyfish showing its face, so to speak, in the prospective victims' eyes, even on the shore.
So many facets. Impressive.
Interesting weaving of fragmented memories, like scenes from a movie laid side-by-side. Never been stung by a jelly fish, but I have stepped on a sea urchin while snorkeling and it is an SOB...
A unique approach to the prompt...so interesting to see where one's mind travels. And yes, so much is mystery.
Ha! /the way of memories and mementos. Very cool. I love the idea of it a;; being pressed into local, and black and white newspaper clip - probably the idea of the collision of the train and best hat. (Hats pretty important in those days, I guess.) k.
Ha! /the way of memories and mementos. Very cool. I love the idea of it a;; being pressed into local, and black and white newspaper clip - probably the idea of the collision of the train and best hat. (Hats pretty important in those days, I guess.) k.
I like how you weaved your memories Dave, clear and crisp as the sea front. This line struck me:
Reserved for most auspicious times, not everyday ~
having just seen the "Life of Pi"...the jelly fish part is brilliant Dave...i love the weaving in of the childhood memories ...but apart from that this is such a good readable piece...makes you want to read it again.
Great images, Dave... I especially like the jellyfish.
A vivid depiction of time past. I very much like the description of the jellyfish. How exotic they seemed to we unsophisticated kids in those pre-Attenborough days!
Such a trip back into your younger years with great imagery...I love how you morph from jelly fish (beautiful, but dangerous sometimes) into your aunt, her hat etc. yet it blends together so cohesively. Thanks, Dave.
No clues at all but the writing is fantastic! The jelly-fish its nature and appearance that can change every which way given the special descriptive treatment. So also the others! Great write, Dave!
Hank
...a jellyfish could be such a luring creature...at first i could mean a thing of beauty and it was...but then not all beauty are safe...for sometimes it could mean trouble or harm...i couldn't agree more on how you describe the jellyfish.. They're just exactly what you said here...and that hat of your aunt not worn everday speaks of deep memories...i could come back and read this poem again and again sir....until i get there to the very depth of the so called mysteries...smiles...
The Elephant's Child
Thank you so much. Your three adjectives I take as a great compliment.
Brian
Yes, for me the jellyfish was the core of the story - in so far as it was a story. It was certainly the central image. The torn newspaper cutting was and is a mystery. Indeed, I struggle to relate any of the "bits". (The whole "holiday" - as I saw it - was a bit of a disaster!)
Ygraine
The whole episode is fragmented in my mind. As you say, memories are like that, but this one has lost all connectivity! I'm worried now, that I might have O.C.D.
aprille
Sincere thanks for this comment. As I mention above, the jellyfish was always central to my memory of this event/these events -- I'm not even sure which!
Frank
I have been stungby a jellyfish, but I still find them both beautiful and fascinating. Thanks for your comment.
Mary
Thanks, mary. So glad you thought so.
Manicddaily
Yes, I guess hats were more important then than now, though I don't remember them being regularly worn by the women of my household.
Heaven
Yes, that summed up the wearing of hats as I remember it.
Gerry
Thanks so much. Haven't seen The Life of Pi and hadn't realised that it contained a jellyfish sequence. Your comment is very much appreciated.
Laurie
Thank you so much.
Dick
Yes, it's true, we don't give them the same regard these days... maybe that is down toAttenborough!
Victoria
Thank you for your helpful thoughts on my piece. I found it a very stimulating challenge. Much appreciated.
Hank
Than you for this. I have a feeling that very little of these events would have stuck with me had it not been for the jellyfish.
Kelvin
A really valuable comment, much appreciated. Thank you so much.
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