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Tuesday, 22 January 2013

4 + 1

his hand soft in hers
her thumb lies butterfly-like
on hard bare knuckles 
love can cuts us to the bone
love is us most tenderly

hands light in contact
what are they to each other
siblings lovers friends
these two who hardly touch yet
have spliced their worlds together

are they now meeting
or about to take their leave
of one another

look at their thick sleeves
see how very cold it is --
gloves lose out to touch

The poems above have been written for the prompt at The Mag, to whom thanks for the image.
You will find the + 1 below.
snowman needs a hat
dad declines to donate his
child in tears of rage

29 comments:

Brian Miller said...

aawwww i feel bad for the kid, but dad needs to stay warm as well....and its a tender verse you spin above.....love cuts, love is us tenderly....those two lines really jumped out at me as they are in many ways the duality of it...

Jinksy said...

gloves lose out to touch

This made me smile, as many a time, despite the coldest weather, I have removed a glove, and one belonging to my 'hand-holder', simply to make the most of touch! LOL :) Loved your words...

jabblog said...

You found much in the Magpie prompt - very sweet but I LOVE your +1 - can see and hear it so clearly:-)

kelvin s.m. said...

...Sir, you + 1 is a bonus...it really is... excellent transition from the lines that precedes to that outstanding haiku... smiles...

kelvin s.m. said...

P.S. Liked your two Tankas...but the second one's quite my fave...smiles...

Mary said...

A very sweet poem this morning, Dave! And yes, gloves DO lose out to the touch. (Hard not to think about that in the de!)

Mary said...

OOps...hard not to think about it in the dead of winter!! (was what I intended to say)

Manicddaily said...

Ha - loved the plus one

And the other is very sweet - really very nice - the spliced and touch winning over gloves - very thoughtful and tender (with the a gentle bite of the real too.) k.

Raj said...

Happy belated new years Sir. And i see that you only better yourself with time.

Helen said...

Between you and me? I love wearing those gloves with partially exposed fingers. All the better to touch with.

That mean old Dad, what a spoil sport!!!

Optimistic Existentialist said...

As a hopeless romantic, I truly loved this :)

Carl said...

It is all about context isn't it? No assumptions on your part. Well done.

Ash said...

Awww..I love the plus one. So sweet!

kaykuala said...

are they now meeting
or about to take their leave
of one another

Yes, are they meeting or going. Never thought of it that way. Love all 5 Dave!

Hank

JANU said...

Sad for the kid...but a quite touching.

Cloudia said...

confound the stereotype of who is soft in the first line. Sets up your own counter-cliche` hyper-noticing reality. . . . .I could go line by line, but will just return and enjoy it one more time. Gloves......did you enjoy our Inauguration yesterday as we have lately joined in your great celebrations?


Happy Aloha to YOU
from Honolulu,
Comfort Spiral
~ > < } } ( ° >
> < } } ( ° >

Tommaso Gervasutti said...

The universe of hand in hand..great poetic reflection.

21 Wits said...

I must believe their hands clasped together like this, will for sure be etched in their memories of it forever...we may forget words, but not true felt feelings...

Berowne said...

Yes, in these cold days gloves lose out to touch...

Leovi said...

Exquisite, I like it, it reminds me of childhood. Delicious poem.

haricot said...

Lovely image and hopeful words. Thank you for having given warmth despite of coldness. I hope this action would be repeated on the globe, without gloves.

Lydia said...

Oh! This is wonderful! You spoke of the airiness, lightness I sensed in their touch with your "two who hardly touch." Really tender piece, Dave.

Dave King said...

Thanks Everyone, so much. I felt a little overwhelmed by the response -- which i had not quite expected.

So many of you have used the word "sweet" of my effort, that I am tempted to use it of you all. (I took it as a high compliment and I use it in that way.)

Ygraine said...

I, too, have often gone gloveless in the depths of winter, just to hold my loved-one's hand...
and +1, well, have to side with Dad there. A glove is one thing, but hat? No way!!

Super write Dave :)

Silent Otto said...

You really got to the heart of this one, Dave, with your well trained poets eye. Thanks mate

Unknown said...

Such sweetness here :) Really enjoyed the heart in your words.

Tess Kincaid said...

Love the butterfly-ness of her hand...lovely write, Dave...

Carrie Van Horn said...

A lovely write Dave!!

Lolamouse said...

I love the line "...her thumb lies butterfly-like on hard bare knuckles." Such a perfect and beautiful image.