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Monday 16 January 2012

pas de deux

It was, the critics said,
the perfect pas de deux.

The leaps, the steps, the moves...
and more importantly:

our perfect empathy;
two bodies known as one.

That lift, so difficult,
I nailed it that one night.

We both left high as kites.
Let's crown the night, you said.

Your place, we thought, the best -
the first for us as one.

Along the motorway
I followed your tail light.

That cutting through the hills...
you'd forged ahead a bit.

I saw you leave the road
shoot up the steep incline...

I thought you'd roll back down.
But no, the perfect arc

as earlier on stage
that brought you back to me.

The two cars fused as one
and shared a sheet of flame.

We watch the dancing now.
I can barely hobble,

you barely understand...
except just now and then

a flicker in those eyes
to greet the pas de deux.

18 comments:

Cloudia said...

Excellent & chilling. Sensational, but measured and earned, not cheaply sensational, Dave. Quite a pas de deux between two poles in that, eh?


Such a delight to see a mind as fine as yours at play-


Aloha from Waikiki
Comfort Spiral

> < } } ( ° >

Mary said...

Well, I did have to look up pas de deux to be sure I had the right meaning. I love the progression, the tale. Quite a fiery dance indeed.

Carl said...

So sad. wonderfully crafted poem.

Anonymous said...

Eek. Pas deux anymore. (Maybe you should work Dieu in there!) Very chilling, and somewhat unexpected too. Well done in poem, a bit like song, really, if you added a refrain about fate and its tyrannical whimsy! K.

Laurie Kolp said...

Suspenseful dancing!

Claudia said...

this is chilling...wasn't sure if it's a real car crash or a metaphor for a fiery night...ugh...but then in the end...it gave me goosebumps...what a tragical story.. i wished they had danced on..

Brian Miller said...

ha i like maniks idea of the song as it is almost there...oh the dance...and the crash make fine metaphors...and in reality or other wise are chilling...

jabblog said...

Unexpected but perfect, sad and reflective.

Susie Clevenger said...

I was startled by the ending, but then that is what makes it such a marvelous piece..Nice work!

Windsmoke. said...

Swan Lake is my favourite ballet. From people on stage in a ballet to cars on the road in a ballet who would of thought you could fit them into one poem, well done :-).

Victoria said...

Ah jeez, Dave. Not an expected finale, for sure. I enjoyed the metaphorical qualities in this poem and you had me wondering about the backstory...what is fiction and what is imagination. You are such a story-teller.

Dulcina said...

Tragic ballet, Dave, but worth dancing & reading.
You know how to surprise your readers at the end!
:)

Cait O'Connor said...

Love this one, you have created a dance on the page.

haricot said...

Graceful images of the dance, while on the cars I had difficulty for image but it's modern and speedy.

Mishilicious Mishi said...

Just one word for it..SENSATIONAL!!

Other Mary said...

Oh...tragedy in it's truest sense, and masterfully crafted.

Dave King said...

Claudia
Thank you so much for your lovely compliments.

Mary
Thank you, your comments are very much appreciated.

Carl
Thanks Carl. Your comments always welcome.

manicddaily
Fate and its tyrannical whimsy? Like the thought, not sure I'd have what it would take to do that. Thanks, though.

Laurie
For me, all dancing is!

Claudia
Yup, was meant to be real, but I see where the doubt comes in. Mmmm, not my usual sort of ending, I must agree.

Brian
Yes, the more I think of the songg idea, the more it does appeal.

jabblog
Thank you for saying so.

Susie
Good of you to say that. Thank you very much.

Rose
Thanks. Reeally well appreciated.

Windsmoke
Well, when there's a tale to be told... thanks for the comments.

Victoria
Thank you for the compliments. It's all imagination. The only back story is that I didn't have an idea and so decided I should just write and see what came.

Dulcina
Thank you for this. So glad you included the dancing with the reading.

Cait
Lovely remark. Many thanks.

haricot
Indeed, I can see the problem.

Mishi
It's a great word! Doesn't need another. Thanks.

Ygraine said...

Disturbing and oh-so-sad, but incredibly beautiful.
I love this :)