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Friday, 29 January 2010

Haiku #32 and #33

I blame the Scottish legal system!



Car stopped in traffic
Driver gets a fixed penalty -
£60 for nose-blowing.



£10 falls from a rear pocket
man receives fixed penalty -
for littering.


(Ayreshire : Same policeman, different miscreants.)

25 comments:

Rachel Cotterill said...

Oh dear. I hadn't heard about that.

Elisabeth said...

Oh dear, life is cruel.

Rebecca said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Rebecca said...

Sorry for the double comment, spelling mistakes!

It is mad. I'm almost ashamed to admit that I come from the same town. And your poems say it all.

jinksy said...

That policeman must have a nose for litterbugs!

Dianne said...

taxed one way or another

Karen said...

This is too funny! It must have been a slow crime day.

Sally said...

I am finding these so interesting- looking forward to the weekend to read some more...

Tabor said...

Some newspapers are so funny and you are very creative with your haiku.

Gwei Mui said...

How utterly perfect and ironic
Loving your Haikus
GM

Derrick said...

Hi Dave,

The first one was on TV last night but hadn't heard about the second; PC MacPlod seems to have a problem!

Raj said...

$60 for nose blowing? dammit i have a cold n have been blowing my nose all day!!! i could fall below the poverty line this week. :)

abt the comment on my blog...
The moon stuck out like a fish on a pole. B rilliant - and typical.

wats typical?

Barry said...

I was stopped by the police last year for an out of date sticker on my license plate.

I think I was only going to get a warning until my dog Lindsay reached over from the back seat and licked the officer's nose causing him to bump his head when he removed it in a hurry.

It was funny until I got the ticket in the mail.

Dorraine said...

He's paying out the nose, so to speak! My, my.

Thank you, David, for stopping over at Ronda's yesterday and leaving your nice comment. Appreciate that. Glad to have also found your blog.

The Weaver of Grass said...

I read about that too Dave - how ridiculous can you get? The chap blowing his nose also had his hand brake on and was stationary - I believe he is fighting it in court.
I do like your topical haiku - keep it up. When you have done it for a year you could publish it as 2010 in Haiku.

Kass said...

I agree with some of your readers that have suggested you make a book of your Haiku. It would be nice to see the original news piece alongside each poem or just a headline or picture.

JeannetteLS said...

Jinksy... she must be related to my dad.

Nose blowing. I have never heard of that particular thing. CT still has laws against certain types of activities between people, even when they are married, and I often wondered how on earth that's enforced...

Your haiku is such a pleasure, Dave.

Ronda Laveen said...

The littering one just cracked me up. The officer probably picked up the money for a tip while he was writing the ticket.

Tommaso Gervasutti said...

Marvellously hilarious. Great.

Linda Sue said...

I thought your poems quite funny- hilarious, in fact, until I read comments that these incidents were REAL happenings- Oh dear!

Cloudia said...

sigh.....



Aloha, Friend!


Comfort Spiral

rallentanda said...

I find these erosion of civil liberties such as being penalised for blowing your nose
and having trouser pockets very depressing. Good for you doing your bit in verse.

It's the same here.In Queensland
a driver was stopped then crashed tackled to the ground with a gun to his head because the policeman
thought that the steering wheel lock he had on on his back seat was
a rifle.This happened in daylight
hours.When there were complaints the Commissioner of Police said that he was pleased that members of his force were so diligent.

Conda V. Douglas said...

Dave, I needed a great laugh today, and you provided a fabulous one. Thanks!

Dave King said...

All
Wow, this brought a fair amount of in terest, both in the comm ents and the emails. Thank you all.
Funny, cruel, ironic, the reactions were various, both towards the P.C. and his victims. I must say, though, that I laughed longest at the comment by Raj.
(Incidentally, Raj, Brilliant - and typical of your general brilliance. Sorry for the ambiguity.)
My heart, though, went out to Barry, funny though his story was.

Raj said...

typical of my brilliance? coming from u that really makes my weekend. :P
sorry for the ambiguity?
oh dont be.


i like this kind of ambiguity. adds a lil fiction 2 life. :P