who lie beneath the ground,
more voluble than us
who never make a sound.
Their projects are complete
their every tool laid down,
their arts have made their marks -
and every word a noun.
Braver than us they were
walking these barren hills
with none of the weapons we use
to fend off the beast that kills.
Lighter than ours, their hearts,
for what they had was a god
like a star that went before
to guide them where they trod.
Stranger than us, they seem
now the bodies have fallen away
but we're one with each soul and spirit -
all made of the same rich clay.
all seemed so normal
none of her friends intervened
just what you'd expect
her taking all of those pills
then posting Bye Bye to them all -
the grandest of Christmas jests
the package changes colour
as the food goes off
free of past's shackles
brains reassemble themselves
in time - or so they thought
those advocates of ECT
switching off parts of the brain.
(Not all my haiku are haiku - see here)
Exceptional, David. Favorites lines: Lighter than ours, their hearts,for what they had was a god." Top, sir.
(Btw you never told me what you thought of "Melanie." If you hate it that is fine.:)
Thanks for the kind remark.
Sorry about my oversight. I am having computer problems - that's my excuse, preferable to admitting I'm half senile.
There was a time when I think I would have hated Melanie, but in fact I thoroughly enjoyed it. I seem to be changing. I'm enjoying the short second life of bree tanner at the moment - unthinkable a year or two ago. I don't think it an exaggeration to say Melanie blew me away.
I take it you saw that programme on BBC4 about the brain too. I’ll be honest when it got to the bit about Pavlov experimenting on children I nearly switched the thing off.
Yes, I felt quite revolted at times - and indeed, I didn't stick with the program to the bitter end, though not from revulsion, more from tedium by then. The program was not what I had expected. I had been hoping for something more up to date, even cutting edge. Most of what it gave us was stuff I had done at college nigh on 50 years ago - and it was ancient then!
Beautiful meditation on death and the dead - and on us.
I second David Cranmer and Karen!
Dave- another stellar post- The package idea sounds a good one for those who have lost their sense of smell or their common sense- makes sense. As for the Brain program- no need to revisit that horror, so much is happening now without the cruelty- the brain , is where god got invented.
I enjoyed your rhyming in the first poem and your thoughts on those that have gone before us.
This first piece is very moving David. It has a good, solemn cadence. I see you were able to 'follow' me. Thanks for that! Hope your weekend is good.
Enjoyed reading your poems, so nicely written!
Best wishes for 2011
Thanks for this - got the synapses firing - parts read like an MRI of your subconscious. Fascinating, Dave.
Stunning Dave, your poem takes over from the raw data of bodies and life.
keep it up...
YEAH!, you win The Celebrate Poet of 2010 Award
Come to our potluck tonight,
Theme: Journey and the road ahead.
Very good Dave.
Thanks Karen, that comment is very much appreciated.
Again, very much appreciated.
Several telling comments there, but I am particularly taken with the last one. Brill!
Thanks - useful feedback, as always.
Welcome and many thanks for taking the time to comment.
Wow, I shall have to watch it, can't have my subconscious read all the time! seriously though, much appreciation for that comment.
Lovely comment. Thanks.
Thanks for that. Will try to get to Pot Luck today!
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