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Tuesday 1 February 2011

On finding an idol-shaped pebble on a beach

Little stone god
small as a pebble
are you controlling
the fate of the world?

Little pink god
fallen from heaven
how large were you there?
how small are you now?

Little lost god
how shall you return?
Shall you burn, baby burn
in the Father's stern gaze?

Little veined god
is it blood that I see -
or a depth that will deepen
the spirit in me?

Little loved god
I'll not throw you back
I'll treasure the fortune
that brought you to me.

Little lewd god
how tactile you feel
when my fingers caress you
all stress disappears.

Little dumb god
it's silent you are...
your siblings still rattle
around on the beach.

Little bright god
polished by seas
you shine like a sun -
a sun cold as ice.

Little proud god
yet hungry for love
if all the world loved thee
would that be enough?

Little stone god
a stone like the stones
that cover the beach -
Oh, commonplace god!

23 comments:

Louise said...

Enjoyed this very much. I have a habit of picking up stones myself! Interesting take on the subject matter.

David Cranmer said...

A fine piece, David. How long does it take (I hope you don't mind me asking) to write something this powerful?

The Weaver of Grass said...

It always makes me thing Dave - the stones on a beach - where have they come from - Like this very much.

JeannetteLS said...

Oh, Dave, I don't even know what to say when I read your stuff. It must be boring to read simply, it made me smile, laugh outright, AND think all at once. But, then, that's what your writing does. PLUS there is beauty throughout. Of course, I liked the "Little lewd God" and last line, "Oh, commonplace god!" The most, but one might have predicted that, given who I am. Visiting your blog each day with my coffee is just a terrific middle of my day.

Dave King said...

120 Socks
Yes, me too! In fact, I usually have one in my pocket, just to handle from time to time!

David
I don't mind at all - especially on this occasion. Actually, it took very little time at all. Not much longer than the time it took towrite it out. The idea for it came late at night, just as I was off to bed. I wrote out the first verse and then jotted down some key words to put me on track for the rest of it in the morning. The following morning I wrote it out - 12 verses. I then changed a couple of verses and the position of a third, changed a few words and took out two verses (One of which I have reinstated since posting - sorry about that, folks!) - and that was about it. I consider it one of my successes, and they quite often go that easily. The more I have to work at something, the more it reads like chopped-up prose.

Weaver
I agree. I really love investigating them to see what I can find.

Jeannette
Well, now it's me not knowing what to say. Not knowing what to say by way of thank you for such a very generous response. It all goes to make the effort of blogging feel more than worth while. Much, much thanks!

Tommaso Gervasutti said...

I enjoyed it and once more heard Blake's echoes from the Songs of Innocence and Experience..

Gerry Snape said...

I've always collected stones off the beach. I've got two in my bag at the moment that are so polished by my hands that they shine. It's a lovely feeling to turn them over in the palm of your hand. Great thoughts.

Rose said...

This is wonderful I love how each verse becomes a little 'pearl' that you so cunningly thread through to the end. Good stuff!

Windsmoke. said...

Each verse in itself is a story, very vivid and enjoyable :-).

Short Poems said...

This is beautiful verse, love it :)

Linda Sue said...

Great poem! God is stoned.

Unknown said...

As the 24 hour snow storm begins moving into Toronto, leaving behind 30 centimeters of snow.... stones at the beach are a wonderful thought. I will go into the other room and find mine in the drawer so I can think my summery thoughts. Thank you sharing this poem Dave. Your curiosity just shines!

Linda Bob Grifins Korbetis Hall said...

dreamy piece.

a pebble on beach is lonely and lovely in poetry.
Cheers.

Snowbrush said...

This is just wonderful, Dave. Indeed, few people are monotheistic despite their claims to the contrary.

You know, I don't know if either of us has ever visited the other's blog, but I've read your comments so often and in so many places that I feel like I know you.

Dave King said...

Tommaso
Wow! You really couldn't say anything more encouraging. Thanks!

Gerry
It's almost a universal feeling, I would guess - sticking my neck out slightly!

Rose
What a lovely way of putting it! Thanks greatly.

Windsmoke
Thank you. Much appreciated.

Short Poems
That means a lot.

Linda Sue
In a manner of speaking...

Linda
That souns like a brilliant strategy to get you through.

jingle
It arose from a memory that was dreamy. Thanks for the comment.

Snowbrush
Yes, I have been to your blog - and will again. Thanks for the compliment. It is reciprocated.

Rachel Fenton said...

Wonderful stones, all, Dave!

Dave King said...

Thanks for that Rachel. Much appreciated.

Carl said...

Really nice one Dave. You took me a few different places in this one, but the obvious one was my favorite it brought me to the quiet early morning of a bayside beach with wonderful light and every small rock you touch seems like something you must keep and treasure....

Dave King said...

Thanks Carl.
That's where I started, so it's appropriate that there should be where we both ended up. Appreciate the comment.

David Cranmer said...

Thanks, Dave. I find the writing process always fascinating and marvel at something that would take me weeks to accomplish.

Dick said...

Excellent, Dave. As a fellow beachcomber who has found many little stone gods but never written them up, this fits the bill perfectly.

Dave King said...

Dick
Yes, difficult to stay a monotheist on a beach, isn't it?
Thanks for your comment.

Dave King said...

David
Some do take weeks, even months or years! Very short works usually take the longest (no where to hide!), but are most often the exception - if that makes sense!