Rough seas all night
rock falls from cliffs
the cave is rearranged
rocks pebbles shingle sand.
A squeeze-through opening is new.
Our torches prick the gloom
Jake it is who finds it.
Wished it had been me,
but his beam picks it out,
reflects back two bright eyes.
We try both beams, but still the gloom
ignores them and their fading batteries.
Octopus or giant spider
decomposing slightly
five legs a wing
sabre toothed a put-together beast
a composite of several looks Egyptian
vaguely
a holiday memento sort of thing.
Something odd about it, though.
Neither can say what
but we both feel it.
want to run but hold our ground.
Unthinkingly,
Jake goes to stroke the image then so do I.
The eyes stare steadily and yellowly ahead.
the rock on which it sits is split was split (but when?)
down to its base
the cleft its facing walls
four finger widths apart
flow with foetal shapes some fully formed
all coming from its flesh.
We're rich! says Jake and famous.
Lascaux Chauvet Laas Gaa'l The Cave of Swimmers
Nothing to top this Stone Age Sci-Fi, this!
Wait 'till we tell...
Let's sit on it a bit (this from me)
Tomorrow we'll return
with all the gear and cameras.
Another night of pounding seas
and we are back our fading batteries replaced
that are not needed daylight floods the cave
a shaft above another fall of rock and our way blocked.
Dismay our chance of fame destroyed.
It's Jake again who spots it first
a jagged stone with a glass eye
and just a hint or two of paint
to indicate malevolent intent.
We take it home they all discredit it
a natural crystal in the rock an oxide stain
No one believes our tale.
That afternoon police arrived to seal the cave.
POLICE KEEP OUT their notice reads.
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13 comments:
Scary to be trapped in a cave by a cave in. Sad finding fossils in the same cave and no one believes you and to add to the insult its sealed off :-).
I believe in you....
REality and the rules of civilization take away the fun of fantasy.
A gripping tale. Excellent.
Intriguing, Dave. Tension built and maintained throughout, the gapping between sentences and phrases providing a sense of the hesitancy of memory across time. Form and content work together to excellent effect here. A great read.
Intriguing, Dave. Tension built and maintained throughout, the gapping between sentences and phrases providing a sense of the hesitancy of memory across time. Form and content work together to excellent effect here. A great read.
Effective, intriguing, excellent.
Oh Dave - what a scary story - and all the more realistic for being told in verse.
I was holding my breath throughout! A gripping story. I was rooting for you!
Wow, Dave, you had my heart beating faster and faster as I read this poem! Wonderful.
Windsmoke
And having your great discovery "sealed off"!
Zulueta
Welcome to my blog and my thanks to you for commenting - and believing in me!
Tabor
yes, that's true, they do, I hadn't looked at it that way before. Thanks for the new slant.
anthonynorth
Thanks for those kind words.
Dick
A much appreciated critique. Sincere thanks for it.
Steve
Really good to have you visiting and commenting. Thanks for doing so.
Weaver of Grass
I misread your comment as "what a crazy story"! Not inappropriate, perhaps, but much prefer your actual one. As always generous and helpful. Thanks.
Lolamouse
Wow, what great lungs you must have! Super comment. Thanks very much.
Mary
Lovely comment, much appreciated.
Is it a story or a poem? We tend to think of these as separate but obviously not. I’m not sure it’s the best title for this though. Yes, it’s a narrative poem, but I think there’s scope here to do more with the title. Good poem, er story, though. Dick is spot on in his remarks.
Beautifully written. Form and words combine to bring the moment to life.
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